Thursday, September 29, 2005

Hiding till this Place...


Well..
new blog...
i'm hidding nw..
I dun wan so many people to know hw i feel..
sometimes... i nt good to let plp know hw u feel...

I wanna blog..
I like to blog..
I wan to write out all my feelings..
instead of putting it in my heart..
I will go crazy ..

Now..
my mood.. is nt so good..
frankly speaking ..
Sad..Gulity ...
Blame who ?
Blame myself ..

I caused it to happen ...
Mood management.. not good..
In anger.. u speak wat u wanna speak ..
Nv thinK...
in the end .. hurting people..
nt juz normal people..
is a good fren ..
long frenship ...
we been thru so much together..
come thru so many thing together....
we may not be the "bestest" fren ...
but.. we r close together.. as least..
LAughter..Tears...
we seens each others..
THe care and comfort for each other...
8 years..
is not ez..
Count ... around .. hw many frens u have for 8 years..
people .. come in and go out of yr life..
I hate Crying ..
But i'm typing this with tears in my eyes.. and the song played..
simply can't stop my saddness ....
Stupid mistakes .. make ..
i hurt her..
I believe she's disappointed in me...
Maybe.. no matter wat i do nw.. Is to no use le..
She may think tt i'm being fake.....
I nv knew tt "anger msn conversation" would bring such thing..

I nv blame the people tt send her..
but i simply Feel "backstabbed"
I won't pin point at people ..
I'm the one who is in the conversation..
I did say those thing..
Come to think of it nw..
y did i say it?
and .. What did i said ??
I dun remember...
Simply ... is meaningless to me.. and
i dun treat it Seriously ..
but.. in words...
I can't really tell hw one feel..
again...
i should i say it.. in the first place right?
serve me right..

yesterday ..
the moment .. i step into the studio ..
i already feel tt something is nt right..
money...
nt pass to mi personally..
i thought she nv came..
but.. she did ..
she nv talk to me..
nt even a smile..
tt was when she know about the conversation..
the conversation which hurts her..


i'm sorry .....gal..
I really cherish our friendship ..
is been rough ..
i cna't bear to let u good .....
but...
i'm in no position to make u stay too...
I'm a siner ..
nothing i can do .. can make u forgive mi ..
the more u say is OK..
the more the guiltyness in me Stab me...
all i can do is.. say
I'm sorry..

It may be my mistake..
it maybe yrs..
it maybe Ours?
I dunno .. depending on who see it... hw is seems in the way...
We dunno hw to judge.. cos.. plp judge differenly..

for some.. they think .. i ;m nt wrong even a single bit ..
tt's wat they think..

"situatioN"
If A and B are good fren .. and A like C ....
and B knows tt A like C .... of cos .. B will stop herself from getting to close to C...
to prevent herself from like C...
tt's her point of view..

Some maybe think ..
ALl single.. Nothing wrong ...

Well.. . i heck all
Cos.. i think He's NOT worth it.. At all..
i nv Regret liking him ..
cos to think of it nw.. he's not worth it ..
HECK...
Well..
I like this blog.. cos. .. no plp knows the blog nw..
maybe it will .... Sooner or later plp will find out..
but at least .. nw .. i can blog .. according to wat i wan ..

****frens dun defend mi pls..
even if .. nt fully my mistake..
I should have say those..